Dudley's dungeon -- Tuesday, 12 June, 2007

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Average rating: Good
Number of ratings: 22

Comments

Dav	June 12, 2007 00:11
First comment: 26 June, 2004	147 comments written
Here lies Dudley. Killed by a falling rockBilbo saw that the moment had come when he must do something. He could not get up at the brutes and he had nothing to shoot with; but looking about he saw that in this place there were many stones lying in what appeared to be a now dry little watercourse. Bilbo was a pretty fair shot with a stone, and it did not take him long to find a nice smooth egg-shaped one that fitted his hand cosily. As a boy he used to practise throwing stones at things, until rabbits and squirrels, and even birds, got out of his way as quick as lightning if they saw him stoop; and even grownup he had still spent a deal of his time at quoits, dart-throwing, shooting at the wand, bowls, ninepins and other quiet games of the aiming and throwing sort - indeed he could do lots of things, besides blowing smoke-rings, asking riddles and cooking, that I haven't time to tell you about. There is no time now. While he was picking up stones, the spider had reached Bombur, and soon he would have been dead. At that moment Bilbo threw. The stone struck the spider plunk on the head, and it dropped senseless off the tree, flop to the ground, with all its legs curled up. [ The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. trap.
Grognor	June 12, 2007 03:13
First comment: 4 April, 2007	1161 comments written
Come on. This one was just awful.
Kernigh	June 12, 2007 05:34
First comment: 6 April, 2005	349 comments written
These comics remind me that scissors do actually exist in one variant, NetHack brass. I read some of the source code and put up a wiki pageThese strange creatures live mostly on the surface of the earth, gathering together in societies of various forms, but occasionally a stray will descend into the depths and commit mayhem among the dungeon residents who, naturally, often resent the intrusion of such beasts. They are capable of using weapons and magic, and it is even rumored that the Wizard of Yendor is a member of this species. Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.: http://nethack.wikia.com/wiki/Scissors However, I forgot to mention Dudley's dungeon. I also made no note of some code in uhitm.c that seems to permit scissors to cause extra damage against both paper golems and rope golems.
DaHusky	June 12, 2007 07:01
First comment: 4 June, 2007	27 comments written
Simply bad. Booooooooooooring. Punchline was known at the first panel if you looked at yesterday's comic.
Antheridium	June 12, 2007 08:19
First comment: 17 May, 2007	442 comments written
"You slice deeply into the paper golem"The original story harks back, so they say, to the sixteenth century. Using long-lost formulas from the Kabbala, a rabbi is said to have made an artificial man -- the so-called Golem -- to help ring the bells in the Synagogue and for all kinds of other menial work. "But he hadn't made a full man, and it was animated by some sort of vegetable half-life. What life it had, too, so the story runs, was only derived from the magic charm placed behind its teeth each day, that drew down to itself what was known as the `free sidereal strength of the universe.' "One evening, before evening prayers, the rabbi forgot to take the charm out of the Golem's mouth, and it fell into a frenzy. It raged through the dark streets, smashing everything in its path, until the rabbi caught up with it, removed the charm, and destroyed it. Then the Golem collapsed, lifeless. All that was left of it was a small clay image, which you can still see in the Old Synagogue." ... [ The Golem, by Gustav Meyrink ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details."?
	June 12, 2007 09:04
First comment: 1 April, 2004	431 comments written
Just wield the unlabeled scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone, With many a scalding tear and many a groan, When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand, Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand. I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd-- I caught a finger: but the downward weight O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst The comfortable sun. I was athirst To search the book, and in the warming air Parted its dripping leaves with eager care. Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on My soul page after page, till well-nigh won Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied, I read these words, and read again, and tried My eyes against the heavens, and read again. [ Endymion, by John Keats ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. you got from the paper golem"The original story harks back, so they say, to the sixteenth century. Using long-lost formulas from the Kabbala, a rabbi is said to have made an artificial man -- the so-called Golem -- to help ring the bells in the Synagogue and for all kinds of other menial work. "But he hadn't made a full man, and it was animated by some sort of vegetable half-life. What life it had, too, so the story runs, was only derived from the magic charm placed behind its teeth each day, that drew down to itself what was known as the `free sidereal strength of the universe.' "One evening, before evening prayers, the rabbi forgot to take the charm out of the Golem's mouth, and it fell into a frenzy. It raged through the dark streets, smashing everything in its path, until the rabbi caught up with it, removed the charm, and destroyed it. Then the Golem collapsed, lifeless. All that was left of it was a small clay image, which you can still see in the Old Synagogue." ... [ The Golem, by Gustav Meyrink ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.. Problem solved. Just pick a couple of rocks with you in case of... Err, blade golems.
Eskimo	June 12, 2007 09:42
First comment: 14 April, 2004	166 comments written
Yes!!! I haven't noticed the subtle change that the cookie is refreshed each time you comment or rate. No wonder life is so much better now...
zem	June 12, 2007 10:07
First comment: 5 December, 2005	64 comments written
I don't know - sometimes a telegraphed punchline can still be funny. Would have rated it excellent if the third panel wereIn 1573, the Parliament of Dole published a decree, permitting the inhabitants of the Franche-Comte to pursue and kill a were-wolf or loup-garou, which infested that province, "notwithstanding the existing laws concerning the chase." The people were empowered to "assemble with javelins, halberds, pikes, arquebuses and clubs, to hunt and pursue the said were-wolf in all places where they could find it, and to take, burn, and kill it, without incurring any fine or other penalty." The hunt seems to have been successful, if we may judge from the fact that the same tribunal in the following year condemned to be burned a man named Giles Garnier, who ran on all fours in the forest and fields and devoured little children, "even on Friday." The poor lycanthrope, it appears, had as slight respect for ecclesiastical feasts as the French pig, which was not restrained by any feeling of piety from eating infants on a fast day. [ The History of Vampires, by Dudley Wright ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. left captionless.
Mordae	June 12, 2007 16:40
First comment: 11 May, 2007	116 comments written
"You hit the rockBilbo saw that the moment had come when he must do something. He could not get up at the brutes and he had nothing to shoot with; but looking about he saw that in this place there were many stones lying in what appeared to be a now dry little watercourse. Bilbo was a pretty fair shot with a stone, and it did not take him long to find a nice smooth egg-shaped one that fitted his hand cosily. As a boy he used to practise throwing stones at things, until rabbits and squirrels, and even birds, got out of his way as quick as lightning if they saw him stoop; and even grownup he had still spent a deal of his time at quoits, dart-throwing, shooting at the wand, bowls, ninepins and other quiet games of the aiming and throwing sort - indeed he could do lots of things, besides blowing smoke-rings, asking riddles and cooking, that I haven't time to tell you about. There is no time now. While he was picking up stones, the spider had reached Bombur, and soon he would have been dead. At that moment Bilbo threw. The stone struck the spider plunk on the head, and it dropped senseless off the tree, flop to the ground, with all its legs curled up. [ The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. trollThe troll shambled closer. He was perhaps eight feet tall, perhaps more. His forward stoop, with arms dangling past thick claw-footed legs to the ground, made it hard to tell. The hairless green skin moved upon his body. His head was a gash of a mouth, a yard-long nose, and two eyes which drank the feeble torchlight and never gave back a gleam. [...] Like a huge green spider, the troll's severed hand ran on its fingers. Across the mounded floor, up onto a log with one taloned forefinger to hook it over the bark, down again it scrambled, until it found the cut wrist. And there it grew fast. The troll's smashed head seethed and knit together. He clambered back on his feet and grinned at them. The waning faggot cast red light over his fangs. [ Three Hearts and Three Lions, by Poul Anderson ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. with an unlabelled scrollAnd I was gazing on the surges prone, With many a scalding tear and many a groan, When at my feet emerg'd an old man's hand, Grasping this scroll, and this same slender wand. I knelt with pain--reached out my hand--had grasp'd Those treasures--touch'd the knuckles--they unclasp'd-- I caught a finger: but the downward weight O'erpowered me--it sank. Then 'gan abate The storm, and through chill aguish gloom outburst The comfortable sun. I was athirst To search the book, and in the warming air Parted its dripping leaves with eager care. Strange matters did it treat of, and drew on My soul page after page, till well-nigh won Into forgetfulness; when, stupefied, I read these words, and read again, and tried My eyes against the heavens, and read again. [ Endymion, by John Keats ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.! The rockBilbo saw that the moment had come when he must do something. He could not get up at the brutes and he had nothing to shoot with; but looking about he saw that in this place there were many stones lying in what appeared to be a now dry little watercourse. Bilbo was a pretty fair shot with a stone, and it did not take him long to find a nice smooth egg-shaped one that fitted his hand cosily. As a boy he used to practise throwing stones at things, until rabbits and squirrels, and even birds, got out of his way as quick as lightning if they saw him stoop; and even grownup he had still spent a deal of his time at quoits, dart-throwing, shooting at the wand, bowls, ninepins and other quiet games of the aiming and throwing sort - indeed he could do lots of things, besides blowing smoke-rings, asking riddles and cooking, that I haven't time to tell you about. There is no time now. While he was picking up stones, the spider had reached Bombur, and soon he would have been dead. At that moment Bilbo threw. The stone struck the spider plunk on the head, and it dropped senseless off the tree, flop to the ground, with all its legs curled up. [ The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. trollThe troll shambled closer. He was perhaps eight feet tall, perhaps more. His forward stoop, with arms dangling past thick claw-footed legs to the ground, made it hard to tell. The hairless green skin moved upon his body. His head was a gash of a mouth, a yard-long nose, and two eyes which drank the feeble torchlight and never gave back a gleam. [...] Like a huge green spider, the troll's severed hand ran on its fingers. Across the mounded floor, up onto a log with one taloned forefinger to hook it over the bark, down again it scrambled, until it found the cut wrist. And there it grew fast. The troll's smashed head seethed and knit together. He clambered back on his feet and grinned at them. The waning faggot cast red light over his fangs. [ Three Hearts and Three Lions, by Poul Anderson ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. is entangled!"
Patito	June 12, 2007 18:34
First comment: 12 June, 2007	1 comments written
Ba! The paper golem"The original story harks back, so they say, to the sixteenth century. Using long-lost formulas from the Kabbala, a rabbi is said to have made an artificial man -- the so-called Golem -- to help ring the bells in the Synagogue and for all kinds of other menial work. "But he hadn't made a full man, and it was animated by some sort of vegetable half-life. What life it had, too, so the story runs, was only derived from the magic charm placed behind its teeth each day, that drew down to itself what was known as the `free sidereal strength of the universe.' "One evening, before evening prayers, the rabbi forgot to take the charm out of the Golem's mouth, and it fell into a frenzy. It raged through the dark streets, smashing everything in its path, until the rabbi caught up with it, removed the charm, and destroyed it. Then the Golem collapsed, lifeless. All that was left of it was a small clay image, which you can still see in the Old Synagogue." ... [ The Golem, by Gustav Meyrink ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. should have met [MedusaMedusa, one of the three Gorgons or Graeae, is the only one of her sisters to have assumed mortal form and inhabited the dungeon world. When Perseus was grown up Polydectes sent him to attempt the conquest of Medusa, a terrible monster who had laid waste the country. She was once a beautiful maiden whose hair was her chief glory, but as she dared to vie in beauty with Minerva, the goddess deprived her of her charms and changed her beautiful ringlets into hissing serpents. She became a cruel monster of so frightful an aspect that no living thing could behold her without being turned into stone. All around the cavern where she dwelt might be seen the stony figures of men and animals which had chanced to catch a glimpse of her and had been petrified with the sight. Perseus, favoured by Minerva and Mercury, the former of whom lent him her shield and the latter his winged shoes, approached Medusa while she slept and taking care not to look directly at her, but guided by her image reflected in the bright shield which he bore, he cut off her head and gave it to Minerva, who fixed it in the middle of her Aegis. [ Bulfinch's Mythology, by Thomas Bulfinch ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details., someone throwing a cockatriceOnce in a great while, when the positions of the stars are just right, a seven-year-old rooster will lay an egg. Then, along will come a snake, to coil around the egg, or a toad, to squat upon the egg, keeping it warm and helping it to hatch. When it hatches, out comes a creature called basilisk, or cockatrice, the most deadly of all creatures. A single glance from its yellow, piercing toad's eyes will kill both man and beast. Its power of destruction is said to be so great that sometimes simply to hear its hiss can prove fatal. Its breath is so venomous that it causes all vegetation to wither. There is, however, one creature which can withstand the basilisk's deadly gaze, and this is the weasel. No one knows why this is so, but although the fierce weasel can slay the basilisk, it will itself be killed in the struggle. Perhaps the weasel knows the basilisk's fatal weakness: if it ever sees its own reflection in a mirror it will perish instantly. But even a dead basilisk is dangerous, for it is said that merely touching its lifeless body can cause a person to sicken and die. [ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library) and other sources ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. eggBut I asked why not keep it and let the hen sit on it till it hatched, and then we could see what would come out of it. "Nothing good, I'm certain of that," Mom said. "It would probably be something horrible. But just remember, if it's a crocodile or a dragon or something like that, I won't have it in my house for one minute." [ The Enormous Egg, by Oliver Butterworth ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details., a confused cockatriceOnce in a great while, when the positions of the stars are just right, a seven-year-old rooster will lay an egg. Then, along will come a snake, to coil around the egg, or a toad, to squat upon the egg, keeping it warm and helping it to hatch. When it hatches, out comes a creature called basilisk, or cockatrice, the most deadly of all creatures. A single glance from its yellow, piercing toad's eyes will kill both man and beast. Its power of destruction is said to be so great that sometimes simply to hear its hiss can prove fatal. Its breath is so venomous that it causes all vegetation to wither. There is, however, one creature which can withstand the basilisk's deadly gaze, and this is the weasel. No one knows why this is so, but although the fierce weasel can slay the basilisk, it will itself be killed in the struggle. Perhaps the weasel knows the basilisk's fatal weakness: if it ever sees its own reflection in a mirror it will perish instantly. But even a dead basilisk is dangerous, for it is said that merely touching its lifeless body can cause a person to sicken and die. [ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library) and other sources ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. or a tame cockatriceOnce in a great while, when the positions of the stars are just right, a seven-year-old rooster will lay an egg. Then, along will come a snake, to coil around the egg, or a toad, to squat upon the egg, keeping it warm and helping it to hatch. When it hatches, out comes a creature called basilisk, or cockatrice, the most deadly of all creatures. A single glance from its yellow, piercing toad's eyes will kill both man and beast. Its power of destruction is said to be so great that sometimes simply to hear its hiss can prove fatal. Its breath is so venomous that it causes all vegetation to wither. There is, however, one creature which can withstand the basilisk's deadly gaze, and this is the weasel. No one knows why this is so, but although the fierce weasel can slay the basilisk, it will itself be killed in the struggle. Perhaps the weasel knows the basilisk's fatal weakness: if it ever sees its own reflection in a mirror it will perish instantly. But even a dead basilisk is dangerous, for it is said that merely touching its lifeless body can cause a person to sicken and die. [ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library) and other sources ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.] and then polymorphed into a stone golem"The original story harks back, so they say, to the sixteenth century. Using long-lost formulas from the Kabbala, a rabbi is said to have made an artificial man -- the so-called Golem -- to help ring the bells in the Synagogue and for all kinds of other menial work. "But he hadn't made a full man, and it was animated by some sort of vegetable half-life. What life it had, too, so the story runs, was only derived from the magic charm placed behind its teeth each day, that drew down to itself what was known as the `free sidereal strength of the universe.' "One evening, before evening prayers, the rabbi forgot to take the charm out of the Golem's mouth, and it fell into a frenzy. It raged through the dark streets, smashing everything in its path, until the rabbi caught up with it, removed the charm, and destroyed it. Then the Golem collapsed, lifeless. All that was left of it was a small clay image, which you can still see in the Old Synagogue." ... [ The Golem, by Gustav Meyrink ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details..
	June 12, 2007 21:33
First comment: 1 April, 2004	431 comments written
I still like the falling-rockBilbo saw that the moment had come when he must do something. He could not get up at the brutes and he had nothing to shoot with; but looking about he saw that in this place there were many stones lying in what appeared to be a now dry little watercourse. Bilbo was a pretty fair shot with a stone, and it did not take him long to find a nice smooth egg-shaped one that fitted his hand cosily. As a boy he used to practise throwing stones at things, until rabbits and squirrels, and even birds, got out of his way as quick as lightning if they saw him stoop; and even grownup he had still spent a deal of his time at quoits, dart-throwing, shooting at the wand, bowls, ninepins and other quiet games of the aiming and throwing sort - indeed he could do lots of things, besides blowing smoke-rings, asking riddles and cooking, that I haven't time to tell you about. There is no time now. While he was picking up stones, the spider had reached Bombur, and soon he would have been dead. At that moment Bilbo threw. The stone struck the spider plunk on the head, and it dropped senseless off the tree, flop to the ground, with all its legs curled up. [ The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.-trap idea best.
Fathead	June 15, 2007 18:55
First comment: 1 April, 2006	1136 comments written
This time, I liked it in spite of how stupid it was.
Cheesy	July 26, 2007 04:29
First comment: 9 December, 2006	10 comments written
Terrible.
Kerta	December 15, 2007 19:58
First comment: 12 December, 2007	72 comments written
A trap doorI knew my Erik too well to feel at all comfortable on jumping into his house. I knew what he had made of a certain palace at Mazenderan. From being the most honest building conceivable, he soon turned it into a house of the very devil, where you could not utter a word but it was overheard or repeated by an echo. With his trap-doors the monster was responsible for endless tragedies of all kinds. [ The Phantom of the Opera, by Gaston Leroux ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. in the ceiling opens and a rockBilbo saw that the moment had come when he must do something. He could not get up at the brutes and he had nothing to shoot with; but looking about he saw that in this place there were many stones lying in what appeared to be a now dry little watercourse. Bilbo was a pretty fair shot with a stone, and it did not take him long to find a nice smooth egg-shaped one that fitted his hand cosily. As a boy he used to practise throwing stones at things, until rabbits and squirrels, and even birds, got out of his way as quick as lightning if they saw him stoop; and even grownup he had still spent a deal of his time at quoits, dart-throwing, shooting at the wand, bowls, ninepins and other quiet games of the aiming and throwing sort - indeed he could do lots of things, besides blowing smoke-rings, asking riddles and cooking, that I haven't time to tell you about. There is no time now. While he was picking up stones, the spider had reached Bombur, and soon he would have been dead. At that moment Bilbo threw. The stone struck the spider plunk on the head, and it dropped senseless off the tree, flop to the ground, with all its legs curled up. [ The Hobbit, by J.R.R. Tolkien ] Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details. falls on your scissors! --more-- Your scissors break!
Quint Sakugarne	January 3, 2008 20:37
First comment: 1 January, 2008	233 comments written
Kerta wins.

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