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Thursday, 25 September, 2008
by T-Jack
                    
                    
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     |.[?!+"%%!?|   
     |.@(+?[%[+?|   
#####-@?%c!([?!=|   
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c "Im in ur store steeling ur g00dz!"
Shopkeeper: "Yeah, yeah,
whatever..."


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Rating

133102
Average rating: Mediocre
Number of ratings: 19

Comments

Paradox September 25, 2008 14:14
First comment: 5 October, 2006 17 comments written
Is that Cherry or just some generic cockatriceOnce in a great while, when the positions of the stars are
just right, a seven-year-old rooster will lay an egg. Then,
along will come a snake, to coil around the egg, or a toad,
to squat upon the egg, keeping it warm and helping it to
hatch. When it hatches, out comes a creature called basilisk,
or cockatrice, the most deadly of all creatures. A single
glance from its yellow, piercing toad's eyes will kill both
man and beast. Its power of destruction is said to be so
great that sometimes simply to hear its hiss can prove fatal.
Its breath is so venomous that it causes all vegetation
to wither.

There is, however, one creature which can withstand the
basilisk's deadly gaze, and this is the weasel. No one knows
why this is so, but although the fierce weasel can slay the
basilisk, it will itself be killed in the struggle. Perhaps
the weasel knows the basilisk's fatal weakness: if it ever
sees its own reflection in a mirror it will perish instantly.
But even a dead basilisk is dangerous, for it is said that
merely touching its lifeless body can cause a person to
sicken and die.
[ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library)
and other sources ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
?
lathander September 25, 2008 15:48
First comment: 25 September, 2008 1 comments written
Funny only if you know lolcats. Most of all "i'm in ur computer looking at ur filez"... or something like that. I only find a similar one right now:

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2008/09/24/funny-pictures-in-yer-filez-catagrrrizin/
Ren September 25, 2008 15:54
First comment: 2 April, 2008 35 comments written
1) I know lolcats 2) They are not funny, 3) This is not funny.

P for Phail.
One September 25, 2008 15:55
First comment: 13 September, 2004 13 comments written
Lolcats has been done twice before - it's only been done well once.
gneek September 25, 2008 16:21
First comment: 18 January, 2008 159 comments written
1) I know lolcats 2) They are funn3h 3) This is not a lolcatWell-known quadruped domestic animal from the family of
predatory felines (_Felis ochreata domestica_), with a thick,
soft pelt; often kept as a pet. Various folklores have the
cat associated with magic and the gods of ancient Egypt.

So Ulthar went to sleep in vain anger; and when the people
awakened at dawn - behold! Every cat was back at his
accustomed hearth! Large and small, black, grey, striped,
yellow and white, none was missing. Very sleek and fat did
the cats appear, and sonorous with purring content.
        [ The Cats of Ulthar, by H.P. Lovecraft ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
T-Jack September 25, 2008 16:56
First comment: 16 March, 2008 52 comments written
Ehm... how did I mistake cats for cockatrices? Now that's embarrasing...

*Note to self: No more meme strips.*
@ September 25, 2008 16:58
First comment: 26 July, 2004 155 comments written
The c is supposed to be a catWell-known quadruped domestic animal from the family of
predatory felines (_Felis ochreata domestica_), with a thick,
soft pelt; often kept as a pet. Various folklores have the
cat associated with magic and the gods of ancient Egypt.

So Ulthar went to sleep in vain anger; and when the people
awakened at dawn - behold! Every cat was back at his
accustomed hearth! Large and small, black, grey, striped,
yellow and white, none was missing. Very sleek and fat did
the cats appear, and sonorous with purring content.
        [ The Cats of Ulthar, by H.P. Lovecraft ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
? maybe... Anyway, This is not funny even for a lolcat comic. Lolcats can be done well, but... This is more of a reference than even a joke.
Arle September 25, 2008 17:36
First comment: 2 June, 2008 29 comments written
f is Feline, which is where cats fall in. c is Cocka/chickatrices and that one other thing I can't recall.

As they've mentioned, this one just doesn't work and the botchin' of feline is just further down the road of poor.
Antheridium September 25, 2008 19:01
First comment: 17 May, 2007 442 comments written
PyroliskAt first glance around the corner, I thought it was another
cockatrice. I had encountered the wretched creatures two or
three times since leaving the open area. I quickly ducked my
head back and considered what to do next. My heart had begun
to thump audibly as I patted my pack to make sure I still had
the dead lizards at close reach. A check of my attire showed
no obvious holes or damage. I had to keep moving. One deep
breath, and a count of three, two, one, and around the corner
I bolted. But it was no cockatrice! I felt a sudden intense
searing of the skin around my face, and flames began to leap
from my pack. I tossed it to the ground, and quickly retreated
back, around that corner, desperately striving to get out of
its sight.

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
.
Wellan September 25, 2008 20:07
First comment: 27 November, 2007 247 comments written
Might have been mildly funny if it hadn't already been done.
Wonderer September 25, 2008 20:39
First comment: 22 March, 2007 106 comments written
Every time I see this reference, I kill a kittenWell-known quadruped domestic animal from the family of
predatory felines (_Felis ochreata domestica_), with a thick,
soft pelt; often kept as a pet. Various folklores have the
cat associated with magic and the gods of ancient Egypt.

So Ulthar went to sleep in vain anger; and when the people
awakened at dawn - behold! Every cat was back at his
accustomed hearth! Large and small, black, grey, striped,
yellow and white, none was missing. Very sleek and fat did
the cats appear, and sonorous with purring content.
        [ The Cats of Ulthar, by H.P. Lovecraft ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
.
Slowpoke September 25, 2008 20:47
First comment: 27 February, 2007 239 comments written
Beware the loltrice. "im in ur stoar, stonen ur mimikz."

Wonderer, please do not share details of how those kittens meet their demise, lest we all go blind.
gneek September 26, 2008 00:39
First comment: 18 January, 2008 159 comments written
Re-rated excellent for Slowpoke's comment.
Quint Sakugarne September 26, 2008 05:11
First comment: 1 January, 2008 233 comments written
Arle: also, cockatoos in Slash'Em.

And yeah, this sucks. If it's a cockatriceOnce in a great while, when the positions of the stars are
just right, a seven-year-old rooster will lay an egg. Then,
along will come a snake, to coil around the egg, or a toad,
to squat upon the egg, keeping it warm and helping it to
hatch. When it hatches, out comes a creature called basilisk,
or cockatrice, the most deadly of all creatures. A single
glance from its yellow, piercing toad's eyes will kill both
man and beast. Its power of destruction is said to be so
great that sometimes simply to hear its hiss can prove fatal.
Its breath is so venomous that it causes all vegetation
to wither.

There is, however, one creature which can withstand the
basilisk's deadly gaze, and this is the weasel. No one knows
why this is so, but although the fierce weasel can slay the
basilisk, it will itself be killed in the struggle. Perhaps
the weasel knows the basilisk's fatal weakness: if it ever
sees its own reflection in a mirror it will perish instantly.
But even a dead basilisk is dangerous, for it is said that
merely touching its lifeless body can cause a person to
sicken and die.
[ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library)
and other sources ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
, then it could be done much better, as indicated by Slowpoke's comment.

In fact, I'm going to rate this Excellent even though it sucks. Because Slowpoke's comment is awesome and that idea should be implemented. Now.
Toby Bartels September 26, 2008 05:23
First comment: 11 August, 2007 83 comments written
Today's haiku (see previous comic for why):

In the general store,
someone is stealing.
Lol'trice!
Slowpoke September 26, 2008 22:28
First comment: 27 February, 2007 239 comments written
To short circuit anyone's perceived need for another meme: 'Trice Wing...

c "ALL YOUR MERCHANDISE ARE BELONG TO US. (Somebody set up us the Finger Of Death[Pestilence:] And I saw when the Lamb opened one of the seals,
and I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four
beasts saying, Come and see. And I saw, and behold a white
horse: and he that sat on him had a bow; and a crown was given
unto him: and he went forth conquering, and to conquer.

[War:] And when he had opened the second seal, I heard the
second beast say, Come and see. And there went out another
horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon
to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one
another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

[Famine:] And when he had opened the third seal, I heard the
third beast say, Come and see. And I beheld, and lo a black
horse; and he that sat on him had a pair of balances in his
hand. And I heard a voice in the midst of the four beasts say,
A measure of wheat for a penny, and three measures of barley
for a penny; and see thou hurt not the oil and the wine.

[Death:] And when he had opened the fourth seal, I heard the
voice of the fourth beast say, Come and see. And I looked, and
behold a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was Death,
and Hell followed with him. And power was given unto them over
the fourth part of the earth, to kill with sword, and with
hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the earth.
[ Revelations of John, 6:1-8 ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
.)"
Antheridium September 27, 2008 04:43
First comment: 17 May, 2007 442 comments written
o/` Someday you'll get your chicken wings... o/`
  November 21, 2008 16:58
First comment: 1 April, 2004 431 comments written
Toby: That haiku makes no sense whatsoever. 5-7-5, not 6-5-2. My try:

Hey, who's in the shop?
Oh look, it's a cockatriceOnce in a great while, when the positions of the stars are
just right, a seven-year-old rooster will lay an egg. Then,
along will come a snake, to coil around the egg, or a toad,
to squat upon the egg, keeping it warm and helping it to
hatch. When it hatches, out comes a creature called basilisk,
or cockatrice, the most deadly of all creatures. A single
glance from its yellow, piercing toad's eyes will kill both
man and beast. Its power of destruction is said to be so
great that sometimes simply to hear its hiss can prove fatal.
Its breath is so venomous that it causes all vegetation
to wither.

There is, however, one creature which can withstand the
basilisk's deadly gaze, and this is the weasel. No one knows
why this is so, but although the fierce weasel can slay the
basilisk, it will itself be killed in the struggle. Perhaps
the weasel knows the basilisk's fatal weakness: if it ever
sees its own reflection in a mirror it will perish instantly.
But even a dead basilisk is dangerous, for it is said that
merely touching its lifeless body can cause a person to
sicken and die.
[ Mythical Beasts by Deirdre Headon (The Leprechaun Library)
and other sources ]

Copyright (c) 1994, 1995, 1996 by the NetHack Development Team
Copyright (c) 1994 by Boudewijn Wayers
NetHack may be freely redistributed. See license for details.
!
Hope I don't get sto-

http://dudley.nicolaas.net
Want to contribute? Write an email to dudley@nicolaas.net!
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